Relationship Relapse?

Last week I had my own version of a release. A dating relapse, that is.

Last week was Thanksgiving and my family likes to make it extra exhausting and do lunch at my dads side and dinner at my mothers. This means I get the “pleasure” of sitting through people talking about how thankful they are for their significant others twice. Don’t get me wrong, I have so much to be thankful for – my health, family, friends, job, etc. However, the significant other piece is still an “open wound” after my break up so I was extra cognizant of it.

So, at the end of the night I did something I’ve never done before….I texted my ex. I just wished her a happy thanksgiving and said that I was thankful for the time we were together. Despite there being minimal substance to the text, as soon as I hit send I was overcome with a feeling of sadness and regret. I felt like I had just sent her a message begging her to come back to me and the feelings of missing her came right back. She never responded to me, but I’m not surprised. In a weird way, it’s probably a good thing.

I’ve had break ups before and unless we ended things with the understanding we would try to continue a friendship (which never works), I always have moved on and not tried to reopen the lines of communication. That has to be why this feels like a relapse to me. But is it really? I don’t think so, but would love to hear your thoughts.

-Seth